With whom would you dine?

:: Language Warning ::

Bet you didn't think a language warning would be followed by a cooking picture, huh? 

Last night, while cooking this, I was chopping carrots and thinking about that question people sometimes ask - if you could have dinner with any of people, who would it be? My answers always vary. Some days it's Jesus and Buddha and Mohammed and Ghandi or Socrates and Plato.  Other days it's George Carlin, Robin Williams, Groucho Marx, Louie CK, and Patton Oswalt.  

But last night as I was chopping carrots, I started thinking about cooking.  About what a lovely and intimate affair it is to stand next to someone and cook with them - how food is a language through which we love and the creation of food is an act of love.

And then I thought: if I could cook with anyone, who would it be?

Of course there are the chefs - Jamie Oliver and Gordon Ramsey.  Great, yes, that would be lovely.  And there is family - I would make fried chicken with my mother and ham and bean soup with my father and just abot anything with my stepfather who taught me to cook. Then there are the heroes and role models- would Einstein cook?  What would I say to him?  If Bill Nye and Neil deGrasse Tyson were in my kitchen would we cook at all?

Then again, there are the comedians.  I love to laugh.  I love to laugh almost as much as I love to eat.  If I had to cook with anyone, I'm pretty sure I know who I'd invite.

I'd invite Harto  because she's amazing and I already watch My Drunk Kitchen when I cook, so it wouldn't be much different except there would be pure awesomeness in my presence.  And I'd probably have to invite Jenna Marbles because I watched her bake a cake with Harto once and I might have dropped my knife and screamed, "THANKS, OBAMA".  I'd probably ask Louis CK and Patton Oswalt to come early for dinner so they could stand in the doorway and just be themselves while I got sloppy drunk and made food for all of us to eat to soak up some of the bourbon in our bellies.

I'm not sure what that says about me.  Here you thought you were going to get something awesome and philosophical and deep because some I started out talking about cooking "Herbs de Provence Roasted Chicken with Fennel Lentils" and doesn't that sound fancy?   Now's probably a good time for me to admit that I got the recipe off of http://whatthefuckshouldimakefordinner.com/.  This reminds me of two other people I'd invite.  The maker of that website and Thug Kitchen because I feel like they both might get along well with everyone else and I always love some people who can eat like they give a fuck.